""It's a real flashpoint for couples because it's all about spending money," says counsellor and Irish Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy accredited psychotherapist Maxine Walsh on the latest episode of the Money Talks podcast. "If you do have a tendency to argue about money, Christmas is going to be a big, big time for that. The vast majority of couples, you'll have two people with different spending habits. That's not unusual at all. It's probably quite rare to have a couple where they'll both have similar spending habits. "So, like with everything else when it comes to being in a healthy couple, communication is the key thing.""
"Walsh notes that "give and take" should be in our minds when Christmas-related financial firestorms present themselves and that people should enter realistic, truthful conversations about budgeting at this time of year. "I've heard of couples getting into that conversation of, 'let's not buy one another presents, things are too tight this year' and that's perfectly fine and OK as long as you're both being honest about that," she says. "'This thing of, 'oh, I don't really want the present' and then having to mind-read: 'Do they really mean that? Should I get something small?' Just try to be really honest, because it's a needless argument.""
Christmas expenses from gifts, events, and hosting often strain finances and increase the likelihood of major arguments between partners. Couples commonly have different spending habits, making conflict around seasonal costs frequent rather than unusual. Open, realistic conversations about budgets and mutual give-and-take reduce tension. Agreeing honestly to skip presents when money is tight prevents needless mind-reading and resentment. When disputes occur, prioritizing listening over trying to be heard helps de-escalate conflict. Active listening and clear honesty about financial limits help maintain a healthy relationship during the holidays.
Read at Irish Independent
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