"Many people end their relationship after infidelity is revealed. For some of them, it's a good decision. However, making such a consequential decision in the heat of intense emotion can't be smart. If a friend of yours said, "I just found out my wife cheated on me. I've therefore decided to quit my job/buy a dog/sell my house/have plastic surgery," you'd probably say (or at least think), "Whoa, that's a big decision to make so suddenly. Maybe you want to think about it.""
"Of course, when someone's been cheated on, they don't know exactly what to believe. They often start reevaluating past experiences, especially ones that seemed odd at the time. But imagining that everything was a lie just because your mate lied about an affair is generally a mistake. It can be comforting to turn a complex human situation into a simple black-and-white morality tale, but that generally isn't accurate. Most people who have affairs say that they love their mate."
Infidelity often triggers impulsive, consequential reactions that can worsen outcomes for both partners. Immediate decisions to end a relationship are commonly driven by intense emotion rather than clear judgment. Betrayed partners frequently reassess past events and may temptingly reduce a complex relationship to a simple betrayal narrative. Treating the entire relationship as a lie is usually inaccurate because many people who have affairs continue to love and care for their mates and can still engage authentically in family life and shared responsibilities. Both the betrayed and the betrayer are vulnerable to predictable mistakes, so measured reflection and avoidance of rash, absolutist conclusions are advisable.
Read at Psychology Today
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