"I'm struggling with something I feel guilty even saying out loud: Watching my parents age is breaking my heart. I'm incredibly lucky as my parents had me when they were young. My mom just turned 60, and my dad is right behind her. But despite their age, they seem so much older than they should be. They give everything they have to their jobs during the day, and then come home only to collapse in front of the TV, eating DoorDash night after night."
"My mom still has a busy social life, but that means my dad is usually alone, scrolling on his phone, eating processed food, and barely moving from the couch. I've tried gently suggesting they take walks, cook at home, or make small changes, but they react as if I'm criticizing their entire existence. They don't want to hear it, even though they have no trouble offering me unsolicited critiques of my life."
"I'm scared and sad. And I feel guilty for wanting more from them than they seem willing to give themselves. I don't know how to help them without pushing them away or how to accept that I can't make them take care of themselves. How do I cope with watching the people who raised me choose a lifestyle that shortens the time we have left together? What can I do, if anything, to help them help themselves? -Concerned Child"
A child reports heartbreak watching parents who work long days then return home to collapse on the couch, order DoorDash, and remain sedentary. The mother maintains a busy social life while the father is often alone, scrolling on his phone and eating processed food. Gentle suggestions to walk or cook trigger defensiveness, even though the parents freely criticize the child's life. The child compares the parents unfavorably to vibrant, active grandparents and feels scared, sad, and guilty. An observation notes that traits found disturbing in others may reflect traits disliked in oneself and that the parents 'sound fine.'
Read at Slate Magazine
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