"I use that metaphor to say: your partner can and should be interested in helping alleviate the negative feelings you have around porn. You do not need to prove to anyone - not me, not your partner, not Bustle's readers - that an insecurity is "reasonable" for your significant other to take it seriously. It is nothingto adjust our lives for the comfort of those we love. (Within reason. I'm still going to vacuum.)"
"Porn is a complicated, thorny topic. I watch it. My partner watches it. I'm happy for him; I don't have any desire to be the only person who gets him going. I'm not here to dismiss your concerns, or evangelize my own personal horny habits and bang boundaries. But as a person who supports ethical porn and adult entertainers, let me be clear: You have every right to feel the way you do."
Feelings of insecurity about a partner's porn use are legitimate and deserve empathetic attention. Partners should express specific feelings and needs calmly and request concrete changes or boundaries that reduce insecurity. The partner who consumes porn should engage willingly in mutual problem-solving and avoid dismissing concerns. Transparency, agreed-upon limits, and occasional check-ins can rebuild trust without shaming sexual expression. If porn use reflects compulsive behavior, professional help or therapy may be necessary. Both partners should focus on underlying relationship dynamics—communication, sexual satisfaction, and respect—rather than solely policing masturbation.
Read at Bustle
Unable to calculate read time
Collection
[
|
...
]