Dear Abby: My son was at Disneyland and he wouldn't answer my urgent call

"My sister recently became very ill and had to be hospitalized for four days. When I called and told our daughter, she was concerned and supportive. Then, I called our son, Isaac, and left a message to please call me because it was important. He did not return my call. A couple days later, my husband left another message for Isaac to call. He finally sent us a picture of himself and his family at Disneyland in California."

"What a rude awakening you had. That you are hurt and disappointed is understandable. Have you been in the habit of calling your son at inconvenient times? I can't think of another reason why he would fail to respond to your urgent request to talk with him. Your son appears to be self-centered and emotionally distanced from you and the family."

A woman reports that her sister was hospitalized and that her son Isaac did not return urgent calls while vacationing, instead sending a family photo from Disneyland and delaying contact afterward. The woman feels hurt, unimportant, and less close to her son because he did not take minutes to respond during an emergency. The response labels the son's behavior as self-centered and emotionally distant and suggests noticing this pattern. The response advises not to assume the son will provide support as parents age and to pay attention to reliability when planning future support systems.

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