"If he needs it to be a team effort, he can dictate the numbers for you to write down and add them up himself. I do not think his comments about your walking away and leaving him are helpful, unless he is this controlling in other aspects of your marriage. Remind him that if the root of your disagreements is money, a divorce would be far more expensive than marriage counseling."
"When calling in a fast-food order, my husband wants me to ask the price of each item and becomes upset if it varies from the online menu price. I understand that in this economy, there are bound to be increases. One day, the difference was about $5. Because I didn't question it, a heated argument ensued. He said, Just forget it! (I called back and said my husband no longer wanted it.)"
"It's his controlling behavior that I hate. His reaction is always the same: Why don't you walk away? Leave! I know he reads your column. Maybe you can help. I know I'm tired, and I think his behavior is emotionally abusive and controlling. He's 64 and too old to be acting like that. Unfortunately, he's been this way his whole life. I need help."
A wife reports recurring conflicts when ordering fast food because her husband insists she ask prices and becomes angry if charges differ from online menus. A five-dollar discrepancy led to a heated argument and the husband telling her to forget it; she then canceled the order. She notes these businesses are busy and that a stroke has impaired her ability to do quick mental math. She describes his reactions as controlling and emotionally abusive, says he grew up poor, and requests help. The advice given is for him to place orders, consider counseling, and seek a doctor's referral.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
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