"If you're terrified of making mistakes, you're likely a perfectionist. While many accept mistakes as a key part of growth, perfectionists tend to form a deep sense of meaning around them, which may or may not be true. For example, if I make a mistake on a test, that must mean I'm not brilliant. Or, if I have a bad game, that must mean I'll never become a great basketball player."
"Perfectionists, however, equate greatness with life-satisfaction - a fix for all of their problems. A perfectionist may say, "If I'm great, people will like me. I'll finally fall in love and be happy." Often, behind it is a deep interpersonal loneliness or sense of emptiness, accompanied by the belief that people are only attracted to those who truly matter, to greatness, which perpetuates a drive that periodically fills the hole."
Perfectionists interpret mistakes as evidence of fundamental personal flaw, overgeneralizing isolated errors to identity and worth. They adopt black-and-white thinking that casts people as either great or ordinary and equate greatness with ultimate life satisfaction. This belief system links achievement to social acceptance, romantic success, and relief from emptiness. Perfectionism creates a persistent drive to attain greatness while amplifying loneliness and feelings of inadequacy. Natural variation in skill is acknowledged yet seen as threatening to self-worth by perfectionists. Mistakes function as reminders of distance from an idealized vision of success, reinforcing chronic rumination and hierarchical comparisons.
Read at Psychology Today
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