Is Watching Porn Alone a Betrayal?

"Every month, millions of people type the same question into Google: "Is watching porn cheating?" It's one of the internet's most common relational dilemmas, and yet, for all the hot-takes and moral outrage, there's surprisingly little thoughtful discussion about what's actually going on psychologically, such as why people feel threatened, and when porn use truly becomes a problem."

"As someone who studies the science of sexuality and has been happily married for 20 years, I approach this question from two perspectives: as a professor with a Ph.D. in human sexuality and as a wife who has navigated the real dynamics of long-term monogamy."

"For women, porn can serve as an empowering space for exploration. Women have historically faced more sexual shame and fewer cultural permissions to express desire, so porn can provide a low-pressure environment to learn what turns them on, find language for fantasies, and gain confidence. The kinds of porn women tend to seek out often differ from men's preferences: more storylines, emotional connection, mutual desire, and, yes, plot. Many women also gravitate toward erotica and audio porn, mediums that engage imagination as"

Millions of people wonder whether watching porn counts as cheating, but there is no single rule that fits every relationship. The key factor is whether partners have openly discussed and agreed on expectations and boundaries around porn use. Research on pornography is nuanced and shows both potential harms and benefits. Porn can provide a space for sexual exploration, especially for women and sexual minorities, helping reduce shame and clarify desires. Preferences vary, with many women preferring storylines, emotional connection, and erotica or audio formats. Couples should make informed, less fear-based decisions that fit their relationship.

Read at Psychology Today