"Parents and kids get stuck repeating the same fights because they can't see patterns when emotionally flooded. A parenting journal reveals conflict patterns, what triggers struggles, and what works to calm them down. The journal reveals your blind spots, helps you plan ahead to break the cycle, and processes painful emotions. After a conflict, wait until calm, then write: What happened? What triggered you both? What helped? What hurt?"
"If you have a challenging child, maybe you've made resolutions like: "This year I'm not going to yell. I'm going to keep my cool. We're going to have a more peaceful home." Unfortunately, without calm parenting strategies and a plan, you're probably going to find yourself having the same fights, feeling the same frustrations, and feeling like a bad parent because you keep losing your cool."
Parents and kids repeatedly engage in the same fights because emotional flooding prevents seeing underlying patterns and triggers. Resolutions to stop yelling or remain calm often fail without specific calm parenting strategies and a plan. Repetitive conflicts are usually the same core dispute expressed differently over time. Keeping a parenting journal helps by identifying conflict patterns, pinpointing triggers, revealing parental blind spots, and clarifying which responses deescalate situations. The journal also supports planning ahead to break cycles and processing painful emotions after conflicts. Parents are advised to wait until calm and then document what happened, what triggered both parties, what helped, and what hurt.
Read at Psychology Today
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