"In my experience as a parent coach, I hear many stories of adult children who live outside of conventional reality. Unrealistic, even grandiose, beliefs often drive them. Some have dropped out of college, or refuse to look for work (or quit the same day they started). Other adult children described by parents who consult me are insistent that they can work passively from home, still waiting for their music to become famous, or hoping to find the next secret to becoming independently wealthy."
"Some adult children inflate their dreams while concomitantly shrinking from effort. They seem lazy. This is because they hold lofty, unrealistic views of success without grounding themselves in the daily hard work and grind that their success requires. Josh's Story Josh, 28, went through multiple jobs, often quitting within a week or two. Instead of developing a work ethic and grit, he streamed his energy into convincing his father that his music "will make me rich.""
Many adult children avoid conventional reality through escapism or fear, adopting unrealistic, grandiose beliefs. Some drop out of college, refuse to seek work, or repeatedly quit jobs. Others insist they can work passively from home while awaiting fame or sudden wealth. These struggling adult children often react emotionally when parents attempt to set boundaries. Underlying these behaviors are distorted thinking patterns, such as feeling too talented for ordinary work, inflated dreams without effort, and unrealistic views of success. Parental guilt frequently reinforces inappropriate expectations, making boundary-setting and development of work ethic more difficult.
Read at Psychology Today
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