"My sister "Sheryl" is in a polyamorous relationship with three men. She has two kids who are 2 and 4, and they all live together as a family unit. Our parents have never accepted Sheryl's arrangement with "her guys", and refuse to refer to them as her family (they use a derogatory term instead). I've tried to stay out of the conflict, but now with the holidays coming up, I'm being forced to take sides."
"My husband and I have just moved into our first house, and we will be hosting Christmas for our families for the first time and are excited. The trouble is that my parents have made it clear that if I invite my sister and her family, they will not be attending. Truthfully, I'm sick of the way my parents treated Sheryl and effectively disowned their own grandchildren because of their closed-mindedness."
A family faces a holiday conflict because grandparents refuse to accept a polyamorous daughter and derogatorily reject her partners and grandchildren. The host is torn between protecting relationships with the sister and avoiding a confrontation with their parents. The parents have announced they will not attend if the sister and her children are invited, effectively disowning their grandchildren. The recommended course is to assert personal decision-making, invite the sister and her children, and communicate that love for family will not be sacrificed for the parents' refusal to accept her. Set boundaries and seek middle ground to avoid escalating a family war.
Read at Slate Magazine
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