"I was the golden child. My mom told me that before I was born, she was grappling with both an unhappy mistake of a marriage and a 4-year-old who had kicking, screaming tantrums every day for hours. I came into the world happy, with a headful of blonde curls and laughing with delight."
"When I turned 12, all alliances shifted. Of course they did, I was 12! While my sister was Velcroed to my mother, wearing the same shocking pink or neon green clothes, my hormones began to change me. I grew more private."
"My mom, perplexed, yanked my door open and asked me how my day was, and I kept silent. She bought me the same bright clothing she bought my sister, but I never wore it. Mostly, she began to hate my now-black hair, my long sheepdog bangs, my curls."
"If it was harder being the bad sister, then it was actually more of a relief being the outcast when I was at college-at least at first-because I could always leave and go back to my bu."
Initially, the favored child experienced joy and attention from their mother, contrasting with the older sibling's struggles. However, as adolescence approached, the dynamics changed. The favored child began to assert independence, leading to conflict with their mother, who favored the older sibling. The favored child faced criticism for their appearance and choices, feeling increasingly like an outcast. This shift provided a sense of relief during college, as the favored child could escape the family dynamics and explore their identity away from home.
Read at Psychology Today
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