The letter discusses a significant conflict between a middle child and their elderly parents, who want to celebrate their 60th anniversary on the child's birthday. The child feels consistently overlooked and emotionally manipulated, describing a history of abusive reactions from the parents when attempting to assert their own needs. The response highlights the importance of balancing family obligations and personal needs, urging the writer to communicate their feelings and explore ways to advocate for themselves, even while planning to support their parents' celebration.
Sixty years of marriage is a significant and rare milestone, one that ought to be celebrated.
This isn't just a case of an overcrowded family calendar; there's something amiss in your relationship.
If it feels to you that they've hijacked your birthday, explore that and try to find what can be remedied by them.
You can and should speak up beforehand about what you need.
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