"My father's voice still rings in my mind: "Don't do a half-ass job." He meant to teach discipline and integrity, and I took it to heart. But somewhere along the way, that lesson evolved into a rule: If I wasn't giving everything, I wasn't enough. If I slowed down, I feared slipping. And so I kept accelerating, one foot pressed firmly on the gas, unsure how to ease off."
"Neuroscience offers a gentle clue as to why we do this. The brain's dopamine system rewards effort and anticipation, not just achievement. Each step forward gives a small surge of motivation -a feeling of progress that can be hard to resist. Without pauses, though, that system can overload, dulling satisfaction and making "enough" feel perpetually out of reach. Ironically, it's the quieter moments-when the brain's default mode network engages-that insight and renewal emerge."
A childhood injunction to always put one's best foot forward can calcify into an unbounded standard that turns effort into obligation and survival mode. Parental messages like “Don't do a half-ass job” can be internalized as an all-or-nothing rule, driving continuous acceleration and fear of slowing. Dopamine rewards effort and anticipation, making nonstop striving feel motivating but ultimately exhausting. Periods of rest activate the brain's default mode network, fostering insight, renewal, and creative connection. Sustainable excellence arises from setting boundaries, cultivating presence and trust, and allowing stillness to integrate progress rather than from constant motion.
Read at Psychology Today
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