"Self-gratitude doesn't quite make sense because gratitude inherently involves acknowledging that the sources of goodness in our lives reside outside ourselves. When I "thank myself," what I truly mean is that I'm proud of myself. But pride and gratitude are different. When I feel proud, I attribute positive outcomes to my own efforts. Gratitude, however, recognizes external contributions -people around me, a higher power, nature, good fortune, and circumstances beyond my control."
"Recent research from my lab identified a simple way to foster gratitude based on this crucial difference. In one study led by my doctoral student Nayoung Cho, we found that U.S. adults randomly assigned to write about positive outcomes attributed to others' help and to circumstances beyond their control were much more likely to experience gratitude than those writing about self-attributed positive outcomes and positive outcomes without specifying the cause."
Gratitude requires acknowledging that the sources of goodness in life come from outside oneself, such as other people, a higher power, nature, good fortune, and uncontrollable circumstances. Thanking oneself usually signifies pride, which attributes positive outcomes to personal effort rather than external help. Experimental evidence shows that prompting people to write about benefits that stem from others' assistance and uncontrollable circumstances increases feelings of gratitude compared with writing about self-caused benefits or unspecified causes. Framing the origin of positive outcomes toward external contributors thus enhances the capacity for gratitude and distinguishes grateful responses from proud self-attribution.
Read at Psychology Today
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