"Imber-Black (1981; Dickerson, 2024), formerly Coppersmith, successfully reframed some behavior problems not as psychopathology or delinquency but as immaturity. Her article, subtitled "He's Not Bad, He's Not Mad, He's Just Young!" helped set a path for family therapy using the old systems idea that it is easier to change the music than to change the dancers. When the music is a song of madness, families tend to respond more kindly but also more helplessly, which in turn pushes the individual further into the sickbed."
"When it's a song of misconduct, families tend to respond more actively but less kindly, which in turn makes the individual more rebellious. Framing disruptive behavior as immature ("he's just young") tends to elicit more effective responses from the family. After all, the family already knows how to combine mild restraint and positive education when a 2-year-old misbehaves. Also, framing a disruptive teen 's behavior as immaturity elicits a reciprocal response in the teen ("I'll show you I'm not a baby")"
Behavior problems can be reframed from psychopathology or delinquency to immaturity to improve family responses. When behavior is framed as madness families respond more kindly yet helplessly, which can deepen illness. When behavior is framed as misconduct families respond more actively but less kindly, increasing rebellion. Framing disruptive behavior as immaturity tends to elicit mild restraint combined with positive education and motivates adolescents to act more maturely to gain adult rewards. Narrative cohesion and narrative hygiene often matter more than literal truth in improving interpersonal relations. Competing therapeutic narratives require reconciliation rather than a single victorious story.
Read at Psychology Today
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