People Are Just Now Realizing They Had An 'Eggshell Parent' And The Ways It's Secretly Impacting Their Adult Lives

"If they tried to set [boundaries] as a kid, there would either be intense pushback to the point where it becomes not worth it, or a blow up to the point where it becomes not worth it,"

"Or even in extreme cases, it could feel dangerous, certainly emotionally unsafe, to set a boundary."

"When we start changing our behavior, especially when we start setting boundaries with people, is we get pushback, there's going to be some resistance,"

"People don't generally like it when we make changes, because they have a certain expectation about how we're going to behave, and when we change that, it's not matching their expectation."

Being raised by an emotionally unpredictable 'eggshell' parent often taught children to keep the parent calm and avoid pushing back. Attempts to set boundaries during childhood commonly resulted in intense pushback, blowups, or feelings of emotional danger, making boundary-setting feel unsafe. Awareness that an eggshell parenting pattern existed is the first step toward change. Determine what makes interactions uncomfortable and set boundaries around triggering conversation topics or activities. Check in with personal feelings when implementing boundaries. Expect resistance because people hold expectations about behavior and may react when those expectations are not met. Persistent boundary-setting can increase comfort and emotional safety.

Read at BuzzFeed