Narcissists: Why They Act That Way and What You Can Do

"Many people feel puzzled by the actions of narcissists. One moment, you feel safe with having someone so charming, generous, and supportive close to you. Then, suddenly, their wonderfulness shifts to something sharp, jolting, and painful. It can feel like a wasp stinging you emotionally, over and over again, rattling your sense of security. As a therapist, I often encounter clients blaming themselves in the aftermath of a conflict with someone with narcissistic traits."

"Inflated self-importance, even when their accomplishments don't back that up Constant hunger for attention and admiration Insistence that their way wins Exploitation in relationships, meaning using others, whether through manipulation, boundary-pushing, or taking advantage of generosity A lack of awareness or care about how their actions affect people A level of arrogance, envy, or haughtiness that's far outside the norm (sometimes loud and obvious, sometimes subtle and covert)"

Narcissistic behavior can alternate between charm and sudden, hurtful devaluation, leaving partners feeling emotionally stung and insecure. Survivors commonly blame themselves, replaying events and seeking ways to repair imagined faults. The label 'narcissist' is often overused, but true narcissistic personality combines persistent traits: inflated self-importance, constant hunger for attention and admiration, insistence on winning, exploitation of others, lack of awareness or care for impact, and pronounced arrogance or envy. Occasional displays of these traits do not equal the disorder. Two broad types appear: grandiose narcissism and vulnerable narcissism, which differ in presentation and interpersonal tactics.

Read at Psychology Today