My mother had dementia but beautiful things unfolded': Cheryle St Onge's best photograph

"I am an only child. My father was killed in a car accident when I was 14 and my mother was 47. We were really tightly bonded after that. She worked at a university and was an artist: she painted and carved birds. She was a wonderful person, who lit up a room and was someone everyone wanted to be around. She was very giving. Later in life, she developed dementia. I left my teaching position to stay home and look after her."

"To photograph my mother felt like sacrilege. I thought it would be voyeuristic. Then a friend, Joni, who also knew her, set me a challenge to take my mother's picture. I turned to my mother on the couch and said: We're going to make a picture for Joni. Then she did a remarkable thing: she turned to face the window and fluffed up her hair. That shocked me. She said: Why not what else are we doing? That changed everything."

"She used to love being outside and we would go out whenever possible to make pictures. This image is of our dog whom my mother wasn't very fond of a jack russell. Skipper loved the hose. My mother came out and they were dancing together, two beings in the sunlight of the afternoon, having their own conversation. Beautiful things like that just kept unfolding. It made the sadness and depression lessen for me."

I am an only child whose father died when I was fourteen, strengthening my bond with my mother. She was an artist. Later she developed dementia and I left my teaching job to care for her. Daily life became stressful as she acted unpredictably and said she was losing her mind. I became depressed and stopped making pictures until a friend challenged me to photograph my mother. She turned to the window and fluffed her hair, which changed my perspective. Small moments, like the dog dancing with her in sunlight, eased my grief even as she spoke about wanting to die. The years together were surreal and intimate.

Read at www.theguardian.com