"I have yet to send out my Christmas cards this year, but the various steps necessary to complete this task have been weaving through my mind for months. I booked a session with a photographer at the end of August. I picked out and shopped for outfits for the entire family in October. In November, the actual photoshoot took place, but not before a flurry of back-and-forth emails deciding on time and place while factoring in the weather."
"Perhaps there will be a clear winner, but the most likely scenario is that I will spend hours deciding which child's "weird face" picture is the most palatable to send to grandparents. They can never just smile, no matter how much coaxing and bribing is involved. Then I will spend time carefully picking out the right photo card and figuring out just the right holiday message before ordering."
"It would free up a little mental space in an already hectic time, but it would also come with the consequence of disappointed relatives. I know because I actually did skip the holiday cards one year. My elderly aunt was heartbroken not to receive one. My husband's grandparents were left without a set of great-grandchildren pictures to hang on the mantle. I had failed not only in the emotional labor of orchestrating the Christmas card, but also in considering the expectations and feelings of others."
I have been planning Christmas cards for months, booking a photographer in August and buying outfits in October before a November photoshoot coordinated through many emails. I expect to spend hours selecting acceptable child photos, choosing a card design and holiday message, and ordering. I will check and update addresses, contact recipients for changes, decide who gets a card, buy stamps, handwrite addresses and seal envelopes. I could skip the cards to save mental space, but skipping previously caused hurt among relatives and exposed the unpaid emotional labor involved.
Read at HuffPost
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