"It's an understatement to say I was stunned. By that point, I had been writing about HIV-AIDS as a journalist for two decades. I authored a major book on the HIV epidemic's history in the United States and its impact on the gay community-my community. I had cried so many tears as I lost so many friends in the plague. I saw up close what HIV does to a body when there is no effective medical treatment. I was terrified."
"It took several months to begin adjusting to my new status. When it seemed reasonably certain that I wasn't likely to die soon, I began to think about what it would mean for me now to be a man living with HIV. I was clear that I wouldn't let myself be defined by-or reduced to-a diagnosis. I didn't want to be 'HIV-positive John,' but simply 'John.' After all, HIV is something I have; it's not who I am."
An individual received an unexpected HIV-positive diagnosis during routine annual bloodwork and initially experienced shock and terror shaped by prior work covering the epidemic and losses of friends. After months of adjustment and stabilization of health prospects, the individual resolved not to be defined or reduced to the diagnosis and to retain personal identity beyond HIV. The person recognized an opportunity to explore living with HIV from firsthand perspective and chose to tell the story in first-person, asserting ownership over narrative framing and deciding to present the experience on personal terms.
Read at Psychology Today
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