My Husband and I Work Together. I Never Thought the Woman I'd Have to Watch Out for Would Be My Boss.

"He is on call a lot, so his phone already rings constantly, and he struggles to set boundaries. Now, however, the owner (female) has also developed the habit of calling him for everything, including any minor thought she wants to share. Because she is now calling him at least once a day and often more (usually for something minor at work that does not need instant answers, but that's a whole other letter!), she is now the primary person he shares his own personal journeys and updates with."

"I understand he will not set boundaries. He does not excel at that, and often it elevates his mood to be "needed." But I really need him to comprehend that I should never be secondary in learning about what is going on in his life, especially when it comes to medical issues after his recent injury. I want to be supportive, but I also need him to tell me things before he tells my already crossing-the-line boss."

"The quickest way to get out from under an inappropriate boss is to find a new job, but that might be hard for your husband to do while he is recovering from his injury. If you decided to leave on your own, you'd lose the opportunity to work with your husband, which you've enjoyed. And if his boss is interested in deepening their relationship,"

A married couple works together and usually enjoys it, but the husband is frequently on call and struggles to set boundaries. The female owner now calls him daily, often about minor matters, and has become the main person he confides in. The wife feels sidelined, especially concerning medical updates after his recent injury, and wants him to tell her before telling the boss. The wife seeks a gentle way to ask for appropriate limits without losing the shared work opportunity. Leaving the job could resolve boundary issues but would sacrifice working together.

Read at Slate Magazine