Asking Eric: Should I tell what I heard about why my nephew didn't get the job?

"Should I talk to Noah? Or shall I just keep my thoughts to myself and let my nephew experience a bit of real life and rejection on his own? Concerned Aunt Dear Aunt: Talking to Noah directly is best. This way you sidestep your sister's defensiveness and can have a constructive conversation with Noah that may benefit him more. Ask his permission first i.e., I have a friend of a friend at X company; are you open to hearing feedback about your interview?"

"Before you talk to Noah, however, figure out what information is actionable. Less helpful: Stop being entitled. More helpful: Based on the feedback that I received, try emphasizing [X aspect of your personality] more in interviews. Because this information comes through multiple links in a game of Telephone, telling him what you heard will probably not be as useful to him as advising him how he might avoid giving off similar imp"

Noah, a recent college graduate, has been searching for a job for a year while his peers have found positions. Managers who interviewed him reported that he appeared eager and qualified but came across as entitled and privileged. The sister is protective and defensive when questioned about Noah's lack of success. The recommended approach is to speak directly to Noah rather than telling the sister. Ask Noah for permission before offering feedback. Provide actionable, specific advice—emphasize behaviors to highlight in interviews rather than vague labels. Avoid relaying secondhand gossip and focus on practical steps Noah can implement.

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