I hope you find a hobby, a friend, or even a TV show to watch. Maybe try meditation or therapy? Maybe try channeling your anger into making your pitiful life better.
Miss Manners: I skipped a party for a colleague I don't like. Should I have lied about why?
I vowed long ago as division chair to never attend a gathering for this individual, so I skipped it. I was confronted and scolded regarding my absence.