#parenting-mishaps
#parenting-mishaps
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#parenting #child-development #family-dynamics #mental-health #psychology #communication #emotional-intelligence
#child-development
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 week agoPeople who were labeled 'the easy child' often became adults who confuse having no needs with being low maintenance, and the difference between those two things is about thirty years of unasked questions - Silicon Canals
Easy children often grow into adults who suppress their needs, leading to quiet suffering despite appearing content.
#silence
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
17 hours agoNot everyone who goes quiet during an argument is punishing you. Some of them learned in childhood that their anger, once expressed, became the only thing anyone responded to, and the original hurt disappeared entirely. So they stopped expressing it. Not to win. To preserve the point. - Silicon Canals
Silence during conflict can stem from past trauma rather than being a power move.
fromSilicon Canals
15 hours agoPsychology
Not everyone who stays silent during an argument is shutting you out. Some of them grew up in houses where raised voices preceded things that couldn't be taken back, and their silence isn't withdrawal. It's the sound of someone trying very hard not to become a person they promised themselves they'd never be. - Silicon Canals
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
17 hours agoNot everyone who goes quiet during an argument is punishing you. Some of them learned in childhood that their anger, once expressed, became the only thing anyone responded to, and the original hurt disappeared entirely. So they stopped expressing it. Not to win. To preserve the point. - Silicon Canals
Silence during conflict can stem from past trauma rather than being a power move.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
15 hours agoNot everyone who stays silent during an argument is shutting you out. Some of them grew up in houses where raised voices preceded things that couldn't be taken back, and their silence isn't withdrawal. It's the sound of someone trying very hard not to become a person they promised themselves they'd never be. - Silicon Canals
Silence after an argument can signify deeper emotional struggles rather than mere avoidance or rejection.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology explains people who grew up with very little affection become adults who are deeply uncomfortable being comforted - not because they don't need it but because need, expressed openly, was never safe, and the body that learned that keeps flinching from the very thing it was always asking for - Silicon Canals
Experiencing a lack of affection in childhood can lead to difficulties in accepting comfort and expressing needs in adulthood.
#parenting
Parenting
fromScary Mommy
8 hours agoIf Your Kids Lead Easy Lives, Do You Need To "Manufacture Hardship"?
Parents face a conflict between providing comfort and teaching resilience to their children.
Parenting
fromDefector
11 hours agoCan I Tell Another Parent That I Despise One Of My Kid's Peers? | Defector
Parenting challenges often stem from peer pressure and developmental milestones, highlighting the complexities of raising children.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
15 hours agoPsychology says boomers didn't develop resilience because they were stronger than the generations that followed - they developed it because they were raised in a time when the alternative was never presented, and a generation for which stopping was simply not on offer developed a relationship with difficulty that later generations have been trying to replicate but have not yet managed - Silicon Canals
Resilience in boomers stemmed from necessity, not inherent strength; they faced discomfort and hardship as a norm, shaping their character.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoI'm in my 30s and I just understood something about my father that therapy never gave me. He didn't withhold affection because he didn't feel it. He withheld it because in the world he came from, the moment you showed someone how much they meant to you was the moment you gave them the power to destroy you. - Silicon Canals
Emotional withholding can protect against vulnerability, revealing deeper love and care beneath perceived indifference.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
16 hours agoI'm 66 and I just realized that the things I used to call my personality - punctual, tidy, self-sufficient, never dramatic - were survival strategies I developed before I was ten and kept running long after they stopped being necessary - Silicon Canals
Coping mechanisms developed in childhood can become mistaken for core personality traits, impacting adult behavior and identity.
#family-dynamics
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoMost families have one person everyone loves but nobody genuinely listens to - and psychology says that person almost always knows exactly who they are, has known for decades, and long ago stopped hoping anyone else would figure it out - Silicon Canals
Family dynamics often lead to certain voices being unheard, creating an invisible hierarchy that affects communication and connection.
#emotional-sensitivity
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says the difference between an emotionally immature woman and a genuinely sensitive one comes down to a single question: whose feelings are always at the center of every conversation? - Silicon Canals
Emotional sensitivity can mask self-absorption, leading to immature handling of feelings and a focus on personal pain over others' experiences.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says the moment a person stops needing to be right in every conversation is not the moment they become less intelligent - it is the moment they become more interested in the other person than in their own position, and that shift, whenever it arrives and for whatever reason, is the single most reliable predictor of whether the relationships they build from that point forward will be the kind that last - Silicon Canals
Building lasting connections relies on listening deeply and understanding rather than winning arguments.
#trauma
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says the adults who seem the most indifferent aren't cynics - they've simply been disappointed so many times that their nervous system reclassified hope as a threat - Silicon Canals
Indifference may stem from a nervous system response to past trauma, where hope becomes associated with pain and disappointment.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPsychology suggests the most reliable sign that someone had a difficult childhood isn't what they tell you about it - it's how startled they look when you are simply kind to them without a reason, as though kindness without a transaction attached is something the body recognizes as unusual before the mind has finished deciding what to do with it - Silicon Canals
Kindness can trigger confusion in those with a history of trauma due to learned survival responses from past experiences.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPsychology suggests people who were never taken seriously as children grow into adults who either compulsively over-explain or go completely silent - and both responses are the same wound wearing different clothes - Silicon Canals
Over-explaining often stems from trauma and anxiety, leading to chronic justification of one's presence in conversations.
Mental health
fromIndependent
4 days agoAsking for a friend: 'My son has just been diagnosed with autism and ADHD. My husband also got tested and has ADHD. How will all this affect our relationship?'
Navigating the challenges of neurodiversity in a family can be overwhelming, especially with multiple diagnoses affecting communication and relationships.
Parenting
fromSilicon Canals
21 hours agoPeople who grew up being the one their parents confided in didn't become mature faster. They became adults who can't tell the difference between being trusted and being used, because the two things arrived in the same conversation and nobody told them those were different experiences. - Silicon Canals
Emotional parentification involves children taking on adult roles, leading to hypervigilance rather than true emotional maturity.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoNobody teaches children how to know their own worth - we teach them to perform, to achieve, and to behave, and then wonder why so many adults reach fifty still measuring themselves against someone else's ruler - Silicon Canals
Self-worth is inherent and not based on achievements or external validation.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoPeople who clean before the cleaner arrives, apologize when someone bumps into them, and pre-explain before anyone has asked for a justification all grew up in homes where taking up space without earning it first was treated as an act of aggression. - Silicon Canals
Cleaning before the cleaner reflects a deeper issue of feeling unworthy of help without prior justification.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoThe hardest thing about being the calm one in a family is that your steadiness becomes load-bearing. Everyone leans on it, nobody asks what holds it up, and the day you finally crack, people don't comfort you. They panic. Because your collapse threatens the architecture, and the architecture was always more important than you were. - Silicon Canals
The calm family member often bears the burden of emotional labor, managing others' feelings while suppressing their own.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoPsychology suggests people who adopt their parents' bad traits as they get older aren't becoming their parents - they're reverting to the most deeply installed operating system they have, the one that was running before they were old enough to choose a different one, and stress, age, and the slow erosion of self-monitoring are simply the conditions under which it boots back up - Silicon Canals
Behavioral patterns from childhood can resurface under stress, revealing deep-rooted psychological templates formed from early experiences.
fromDaily Mom magazine
19 hours agoToddler Fun: Engaging Outdoor Activities For 2 Year Olds
Outdoor sensory play is a fun and educational way for babies and toddlers to explore the world. Activities like digging in soil or feeling different textures promote hand-eye coordination and early science learning.
Parenting
Parenting
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks ago7 behavioral patterns people display when they were raised by a parent who loved them deeply but had no idea how to express it without criticism - Silicon Canals
Critical parents can love deeply yet struggle to express it without criticism, leading to complex emotional patterns in their children.
fromPsychology Today
1 month agoHow Feelings Lead to Hitting
But I would like to take a different approach. I would like to suggest that we can make some headway by considering that human behaviors are caused by their feelings, and if we can put words to the feelings (verbalization), we will go a long way to stopping physical punishment.
Mental health
fromPsychology Today
2 months ago10 Things to Do That Can Make You a Better Parent
Saying yes to your child means loosening the reins and indulging them a little. It means being as flexible as you can while still setting clear limits as you normally would. For instance, let them make a fort from blankets, pillows, and couch cushions, knowing this will create more work for you, cleaning up later. Let them paint their bike. Let them invent a cookie recipe which you help them make and bake, knowing it will likely be barely edible. You get the idea.
Parenting
fromBusiness Insider
2 months agoI regret not practicing gentle parenting with my oldest kids. I'm making up for lost time now.
Parenting evolved from old-school punitive methods to a gentle, guidance-focused approach emphasizing natural consequences, trust-building, and learning from experience.
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