#masking

#masking

We've all been there: Someone asks if you're okay, and even though your world feels like it's crumbling, you manage a weak smile and say, "I'm just tired." It rolls off the tongue so easily, doesn't it? Like a reflex we've perfected over years of practice. I used to be the queen of this response. During my worst anxiety spirals in my twenties, when deadlines loomed and my chest felt tight,

For most of my life, I asked myself a quiet question: What's wrong with me? I didn't say it out loud. I didn't have to. It was stitched into how I moved through the world - hyperaware, self-correcting, and always just a little out of step. I knew how to "pass" in the right settings, but never without effort. Underneath it all, I was exhausted by the daily performance of normal.

Masking, or camouflaging, refers to hiding one's authentic self to meet expectations contrary to one’s true nature, especially prominent in autistic and neurodivergent individuals.