There's a difference between trying to reduce your overall stress and looking to specifically control levels of cortisol, however. As Devi Shastri reports for the Associated Press, a number of medical experts have argued that, although there are certain parts of the body that people should be concerned about, cortisol is not one of them. As with many things involving medicine and the human body, medical professionals have advocated for being able to get an expert's opinion.
Distress tolerance is the perception and ability to tolerate emotional discomfort without allowing it to derail your actions (or your relationships). When we believe we can make space for challenging emotions, our behavior isn't focused on getting rid of them. This then opens us up to responding in ways that align with our values.
We're experiencing chronic stress, which blocks our ability to hope. Here's why: the amygdala, the brain's alarm center, reacts with fight, flight, or freeze (Akil & Nestler, 2023; LeDoux, 1996). This reaction can save our lives in an emergency. When we're in a crosswalk and see a car speeding toward us, we can react by stopping or jumping out of the way.
True anger has characteristics that frozen fight-or-flight completely lacks: Directional: It points toward a specific violation, not diffuse irritability at everything. Connected to values: It arises from what you care about, what matters deeply to you. Proportionate: The intensity matches the actual offense. Resolving: When addressed or fully experienced, it naturally dissipates. Think of the parent protecting their bullied child. The person discovering they've been lied to by someone they trusted.
Our culture, and often our upbringing, teaches us that emotional strength equals control; rather than working through or processing difficult emotions, like anger, grief, shame, and fear, we learn to push feelings aside and 'get over it'. Don't dwell. Don't fall apart. Be positive. Get a grip. We learn to project an image of unrealistic stability and strength, while ignoring our actual mental state.
