#boys-and-masculinity
#boys-and-masculinity
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#masculinity
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoThere is a specific kind of masculinity that comes not from dominance but from integrity, calmness, and emotional steadiness - they make others feel safe - Silicon Canals
True strength in masculinity is calm, steady, and emotionally safe, contrasting with loud, dominant behaviors often mistaken for confidence.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
3 weeks agoPsychology says men raised in the 1960s and 70s weren't just taught to be strong - they were taught that strength meant carrying everything alone, and that single belief created a generation who confused endurance with emotional health - Silicon Canals
Men of previous generations were taught to handle stress alone, leading to emotional suppression and difficulties in expressing feelings.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoI want to say something that my generation rarely says out loud: being tough your whole life doesn't actually protect you from loneliness - it just means you're better at hiding it from everyone, including yourself - Silicon Canals
Being tough can lead to loneliness and isolation, as it prevents genuine connections and vulnerability.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoI grew up in a family where asking for help was the same as admitting weakness - and now I'm 66 and sitting alone with problems I don't know how to solve because I never learned how to say "I'm struggling" - Silicon Canals
Asking for help is often perceived as a weakness, rooted in deep-seated beliefs about masculinity and self-reliance.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoThere is a specific kind of masculinity that comes not from dominance but from integrity, calmness, and emotional steadiness - they make others feel safe - Silicon Canals
True strength in masculinity is calm, steady, and emotionally safe, contrasting with loud, dominant behaviors often mistaken for confidence.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
3 weeks agoPsychology says men raised in the 1960s and 70s weren't just taught to be strong - they were taught that strength meant carrying everything alone, and that single belief created a generation who confused endurance with emotional health - Silicon Canals
Men of previous generations were taught to handle stress alone, leading to emotional suppression and difficulties in expressing feelings.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoMost men who grew up in the 1960s and 70s were taught that admitting you needed help was a character flaw. Finally, we are discovering that openness has its own kind of strength. - Silicon Canals
Men are taught to suppress emotions, leading to loneliness and health issues.
#identity
Bootstrapping
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoThe reason some men never move forward in life has nothing to do with motivation or discipline - it's that they built their entire identity around a version of themselves that stopped being true years ago, and starting over feels like admitting it was all wasted - Silicon Canals
Many individuals struggle to update their identities after past failures, clinging to outdated self-perceptions.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoPsychology says people who are warm in public but distant in private aren't being fake in either setting - they've built an entire social identity around the version of themselves that performs well in rooms and they genuinely don't know who shows up when the room is empty - Silicon Canals
People may develop a polished public persona that overshadows their true self, leading to a disconnect between social performance and personal identity.
Writing
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoWe boomers were handed a very clear script for what a successful life was supposed to look like, and a lot of us followed it - only to find that from the inside, it felt like wearing someone else's coat for thirty years. - Silicon Canals
Following a prescribed life script can lead to feelings of living someone else's life despite achieving traditional success.
#friendship
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoI'm in my thirties and I finally understand that the friendships I lost weren't lost because I changed. They were lost because I stopped performing the version of me that made the relationship possible, and nobody told me that was what had been holding it together - Silicon Canals
Friendships often end not due to change, but when one person stops the emotional labor that sustains them.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoPeople don't stay in friendships they've outgrown because they're weak - they stay because identity is bound up in being the kind of person who doesn't abandon people - Silicon Canals
People stay in outgrown friendships due to their identity being tied to the idea of not leaving, not out of cowardice or weakness.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoName one person who knows what you're actually going through right now. Not the curated version. The real one. If it took you more than three seconds, that's not a failure of friendship - that's the architecture of modern adulthood working exactly as designed - Silicon Canals
Friendships in adulthood are endangered due to the challenges of fostering new connections and renegotiating old ones.
#looksmaxxing
Health
fromScary Mommy
1 month agoWhat Is "Looksmaxxing"? The Dangerous Trend Affecting Teen Boys, Explained
Looksmaxxing, a trend originating from incel forums and popularized on TikTok, encourages teens to maximize physical attractiveness through extreme measures, raising health and psychological concerns among medical professionals.
Careers
fromSilicon Canals
6 days agoI'm 66 and I finally realized that I've spent my entire adult life chasing a version of success that my father defined in 1985 - and the reason I feel so empty now isn't because I failed, it's because I succeeded at building someone else's dream and called it mine - Silicon Canals
Success can be inherited but may not align with personal fulfillment or happiness.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
18 hours agoPsychology says the reason so many people crash emotionally in their early 60s isn't retirement or aging - it's the first time in decades they've had enough silence to hear their own thoughts and they don't recognize the person thinking them - Silicon Canals
Highly functional individuals often face delayed emotional collapse in their sixties due to decades of avoidance and relentless life pressures.
#loneliness
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoSomewhere around 55 a man realizes that every friend he has is actually his wife's friend's husband, and if the dinner invitations ever stopped coming, he would not have a single person to call, and he knows this, and he has never said it out loud - Silicon Canals
Loneliness in men often increases with age, despite societal beliefs that marriage and family provide social fulfillment.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoThe loneliest men in any family aren't the ones who left - they're the ones who stayed, paid every bill, fixed every problem, and died without anyone knowing what they actually felt - Silicon Canals
Loneliness often stems from being the reliable one, carrying burdens silently while others remain unaware of the emotional struggles beneath the surface.
fromQueerty
5 days agoSpectacle or support? The complicated visibility of trans youth in film & TV - Queerty
Since the 1990s, a largely underground upwelling of trans creativity has helped new trans identities, communities, and political movements come together. Trans Cinema provides an entryway to the wildly diverse and creative cinema made by trans creators, including those who are BIPOC.
LGBT
#emotional-health
Retirement
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoTough it out' was the only emotional instruction a whole generation of men ever received - and now they're sitting in retirement wondering why their body aches and nobody calls - Silicon Canals
Retirement brings a realization of emotional neglect and the need for deeper connections among men.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
1 week agoPsychology suggests that men who were told "man up" as boys don't just suppress their emotions - they develop a pattern of harmful avoidance and it's misread as strength - Silicon Canals
Emotional suppression in men leads to serious health risks and relationship issues, as societal norms discourage vulnerability and expression of feelings.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoMy father taught me how to change a tire, how to check the oil, how to patch a hole in drywall, and how to fix a running toilet - and he never once taught me how to say I love you or how to hold someone when they cry or how to admit I was scared, and I've spent my whole adult life as a man who can fix every single thing in the house except the silence sitting in the middle of it - Silicon Canals
Emotional absence can be a legacy inherited from fathers who prioritize practical skills over vulnerability and emotional expression.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoResearch suggests that people who say they prefer being alone aren't always telling the truth. Many of them preferred connection until it repeatedly disappointed them, and solitude became the story they told to make the disappointment portable. - Silicon Canals
Solitude is often misinterpreted as a preference, when it may actually be an adaptation to past relational failures.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoPsychology suggests men who are deeply unhappy in life but hide it well aren't being strong - they're running a performance that costs them every real connection they have, and the people closest to them almost never see it coming - Silicon Canals
Men often mask their depression with busyness and distraction, making it difficult to recognize their true emotional state.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
5 days agoPsychology says people who grew up in the 1960s and 70s don't handle hardship better than everyone else because they are stronger - they handle it better because they were never offered the alternative, and a person who was never offered the alternative develops a relationship with difficulty that people who were offered it spend their whole lives trying to build in a gym - Silicon Canals
Struggling is a norm for my generation because we never knew life could be comfortable.
#body-image
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoThere is a particular loneliness in being a man whose body never matched the archetype he was taught to aspire to. Not because anyone was cruel about it, but because the world built its furniture, its expectations, and its respect around a size he would never reach. - Silicon Canals
Body image issues in men stem from societal expectations and architectural norms, leading to a profound, often unacknowledged loneliness.
Independent films
fromIndependent
1 month agoLorraine Courtney: Young men are turning to the 'manosphere' because masculinity has been unfairly scrutinised and criticised - they just want to belong
Society condemns girls extensively but applies different standards to boys, raising questions about gendered accountability and media scrutiny of young men.
Social justice
fromMail Online
1 month agoBoys as young as 11 are being exposed to misogyny online, study finds
Young boys aged 11-14 are rapidly exposed to misogynistic content online, with 73% encountering harmful material within 18 minutes of logging on, driven by algorithms designed to maximize engagement.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
1 week agoI'm 66 and my wife Donna said something last week that I haven't been able to stop thinking about. She said the reason our sons don't call more isn't because they don't love me. It's because I taught them that strong men don't need checking on, and they believed me. - Silicon Canals
Father-son silence often reflects learned emotional stoicism rather than a broken relationship, demonstrating that strong men don't need to check in.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
2 weeks agoThere's a generation of men who were taught that providing was the same as loving. And there's a generation of their children who spent years in therapy learning that those aren't the same thing, only to reach an age where they finally understand that for their fathers, inside the architecture they were given, it was. - Silicon Canals
Emotional estrangement between fathers and children stems from generational differences in expressing love and vulnerability.
US politics
fromJezebel
1 month agoOne-Third of Gen Z Men Dream of Being Toxic Husbands
A global survey reveals Gen Z men hold increasingly traditional gender views, with significant percentages believing women shouldn't initiate sex, should be less independent, and wives should obey husbands, contributing to declining sexual activity rates.
fromUnHerd
1 month agoThe teenage-boy proving ground
The teenaged boy was the victim of what local news sources called a "social-media challenge" or "TikTok stunt" gone awry. He'd been with a group of friends who were filming the exploit, and who fled the scene without calling for help for fear of getting arrested - though, naturally, they also immediately posted video of the accident to social media.
New York City
Social media marketing
fromThe Conversation
1 month agoHow 'looksmaxxing' self-improvement apps are marketing misogyny to young men
Incel ideology promoting genetic determinism in dating is spreading to teenagers through AI-powered looksmaxxing apps that monetize appearance insecurities and mainstream toxic masculinity.
Right-wing politics
fromwww.theguardian.com
1 month agoThere is no shame in being vain': the relentless rise of impossible male beauty standards
Male political and cultural figures increasingly perform militaristic authority through carefully curated facial presentation and appearance, while men's faces face unprecedented public scrutiny previously reserved for women.
Public health
fromwww.theguardian.com
2 months agoManosphere' influencers pushing testosterone tests are convincing healthy young men there is something wrong with them, study finds
Influencers and wellness companies promote routine testosterone screening to young men, medicalising normal variations and driving profit without clear clinical benefit.
fromEurekAlert!
2 months ago'Masculinity crisis': Influencers on social media promote low testosterone to young men, study finds
Young men are being encouraged to undergo testosterone testing and start hormone therapy through Instagram and TikTok content that promotes unproven health claims while downplaying medical risks, a new international study has found. The study was done at the University of Sydney's Faculty of Medicine and Health, and led by Emma Grundtvig Gram, a visiting PhD student from the University of Copenhagen.
Psychology
fromHuffPost
1 month agoMen Are More Likely To Exhibit This 1 Behavior When Other Men Are Creepy. The Reason Is Telling.
Men intervene less frequently than women in uncomfortable social situations due to masculine norms emphasizing dominance, fear of peer judgment, and confusion about acceptable behavior.
fromPsychology Today
2 months agoTeens Are Asking to Be Seen: The Politics of Growing Up
Adolescence has always been a season of becoming. One of its most striking features is the dawning awareness that childhood is ending and adulthood is coming into view. This realization touches nearly every part of a young person's life: how they think, what they value, and, increasingly, how they understand the world beyond their own front door. Yet many teens encounter a familiar frustration as they begin to speak with more complexity-the sense of being dismissed, underestimated, or gently waved aside.
Parenting
Relationships
fromHuffPost
1 month agoGrown-Ass Men Reveal The Moment They Knew They Were A 'Manchild'
A father's failure to verify his son's event schedule resulted in missing the competition, revealing a pattern of delegating parental responsibilities and prioritizing being liked over being a responsible adult.
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