#adolescent-trauma
#adolescent-trauma
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#mental-health #parenting #psychology #resilience #emotional-health #child-development #relationships
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
8 hours agoPsychology says people who grew up in the 1960s and 70s don't handle hardship better than everyone else because they are stronger - they handle it better because they were never offered the alternative, and a person who was never offered the alternative develops a relationship with difficulty that people who were offered it spend their whole lives trying to build in a gym - Silicon Canals
Struggling is a norm for my generation because we never knew life could be comfortable.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
6 hours agoPsychology says people who were the emotional anchor for their families rarely experience loneliness as a single event. They experience it as a slow accounting where they realize the support only ever flowed in one direction and nobody designed a return current. - Silicon Canals
Family support often flows in one direction, with one person bearing the emotional load while others remain uninvolved.
#grief
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says the reason some people become gentler as they age while others become bitter has nothing to do with personality. It depends on whether they processed their grief along the way or stored it in their body and called it toughness - Silicon Canals
Grief, especially non-finite losses, significantly influences whether individuals become gentler or more bitter as they age.
fromPsychology Today
1 day agoGrief, Storytelling, and Identity
The concept album is a response to the brutal murder of Breedlove's father and stepmother at the hands of his stepbrother. The frame—the first song and the last—of the album is about the murders and their aftermath. But this is not a true crime record.
Music production
Retirement
fromSilicon Canals
3 days agoPsychology says the secret to a good retirement isn't wealth or health or even relationships - it's having at least one thing you're still in the middle of, still becoming, still learning how to do - Silicon Canals
Retirement fulfillment stems from ongoing pursuits and curiosity, not just financial security or traditional metrics of success.
#parenting
Parenting
fromPsychology Today
6 hours ago3 Reasons to Stop Hiding Your Bad Habits From Your Kids
Parenting involves modeling honesty and resilience, as hiding flaws can distort children's moral development and trust.
Parenting
fromSlate Magazine
1 day agoMy Wife Is Struggling With a Very Basic Part of Parenting. I Can't Keep Swooping In to Save Her!
Managing emotional responses in parenting is crucial for effective problem-solving with young children.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
9 hours agoPsychology says the people who age most visibly aren't the ones with the hardest lives - they're the ones who never learned to put things down, who carried every disappointment and every grievance and every unfairness forward into the next decade, and the carrying shows, eventually, in ways that no amount of sleep or skincare has ever been shown to address - Silicon Canals
Chronic psychological stress and the inability to release emotional burdens accelerate aging and impact physical appearance.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
4 hours agoThe person who thrives during a crisis and falls apart during ordinary weeks isn't broken. Their entire operating system was built for emergencies, and peace registers as a system error because they never learned what competence feels like without urgency underneath it. - Silicon Canals
Crisis-thrivers are often dysregulated, struggling with normalcy after emergencies, revealing a deeper issue with their nervous system's response to stress.
Mindfulness
fromSilicon Canals
1 hour agoThe people who forgive quickly and the people who forgive slowly are not experiencing the same emotion. Quick forgiveness is often a nervous system releasing a threat. Slow forgiveness is a mind rebuilding a model of someone it can no longer predict. - Silicon Canals
Forgiveness is a complex process influenced by biological and psychological factors, not simply a choice between letting go or holding grudges.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says the adults most likely to end up in therapy aren't the ones who had dramatic or obviously painful childhoods - they're the ones who grew up in households where everything was technically fine, nobody was cruel, and something essential was quietly missing in a way that took decades to find the words for - Silicon Canals
Emotional neglect in seemingly fine childhoods can have profound effects, leaving individuals feeling their inner world doesn't matter.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoNeuroscience reveals that the calmest person in any crisis isn't naturally fearless - their brain learned to delay panic because their childhood required them to be functional before they were allowed to be afraid - Silicon Canals
Calmness under pressure is a learned response, not merely a personality trait or temperament.
Relationships
fromSilicon Canals
5 days agoPeople who grew up watching their parents stay together unhappily often become adults who are simultaneously terrified of commitment and terrified of leaving. They inherited the architecture of endurance without ever being shown what it was supposed to protect - Silicon Canals
Children of unhappy marriages may develop relational paralysis, feeling unable to commit or leave due to learned endurance without understanding its purpose.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 day agoPsychology says adults who have no close friends aren't necessarily antisocial or unlikable. Many of them learned in childhood that being vulnerable leads to pain, and they grew up assuming that keeping people at a distance is safer - Silicon Canals
Many people appear self-sufficient but struggle with deep-seated fears of vulnerability due to early attachment experiences.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
9 hours agoI'm 66 and I recently understood that the reason I find it so hard to ask for help is not independence - it is the very specific and very old belief that needing something from another person is the first step toward becoming a burden, and a burden, in the house I grew up in, was the one thing nobody was allowed to be - Silicon Canals
Independence can often mask fear, leading to a reluctance to ask for help and a belief that needing assistance is a weakness.
Parenting
fromSilicon Canals
5 days agoThe people who become the calmest adults are almost never the ones who had calm childhoods. They're the ones who grew up in houses where someone else's mood was the weather, and they learned to regulate the entire room before they ever learned to regulate themselves. - Silicon Canals
Children from chaotic homes can develop heightened emotional awareness and calmness, contrary to the belief that such environments only produce turbulence.
fromPsychology Today
4 hours agoMy Child Has Autism: How Do I Know the Program Is Working?
If the application of behavioral techniques does not produce large enough effects for practical value, then the application has failed. Practical value is whatever you define as meaningful for your child's life.
Mental health
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoThere's a generation of people who were taught to apologize for their needs so effectively that as adults they experience wanting something as a form of aggression against whoever might have to provide it - Silicon Canals
Many adults associate expressing needs with guilt, viewing requests as impositions rather than natural interactions.
#trauma
Parenting
fromPsychology Today
1 week agoHealing From Our Trauma Helps Shape Future Generations
Healing breaks generational trauma patterns and transforms relational dynamics and biology.
Mental health
fromPsychology Today
5 days agoWhen Should We Be Over Our Trauma?
Healing from trauma is a complex process influenced by support, safety, and resources, not merely time.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoThe cruelest myth about self-discipline is that you have to feel ready - you don't, you never will, and the people who figured that out earlier simply have more years of evidence that the feeling eventually follows the action - Silicon Canals
Self-discipline begins with action, not feelings of readiness or motivation.
Mental health
fromSilicon Canals
2 days agoI'm 37 and I've already learned the hard way that self-worth takes time, healing isn't linear, and letting go is painful while you're learning to move forward - Silicon Canals
Carrying emotional weight from the past hinders self-worth; true self-worth is built internally, not through external validation.
#emotional-intelligence
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
4 days agoChildren who grew up in homes where one parent was the peacekeeper and the other was the storm almost always become adults who can read a room in seconds but have no idea what they actually feel when nobody else is in it - Silicon Canals
Emotional intelligence can stem from childhood experiences in volatile family dynamics, leading to heightened perception of others but self-blindness.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
5 days agoThere's a generation of men who became their mother's therapist before they turned twelve, and they grew into adults who can read a room in seconds but have no idea how to sit in one without scanning for danger - Silicon Canals
Boys often learn emotional intelligence as a defense mechanism due to emotional parentification, impacting their adult relationships and emotional health.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
6 days agoNot everyone who stays silent during an argument is shutting you out. Some of them grew up in houses where raised voices preceded things that couldn't be taken back, and their silence isn't withdrawal. It's the sound of someone trying very hard not to become a person they promised themselves they'd never be. - Silicon Canals
Silence after an argument can signify deeper emotional struggles rather than mere avoidance or rejection.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 week agoPsychology says people who apologize constantly without realizing it are more damaged than they appear - because they internalize blame and absorb conflict, a survival response from childhood, which never switches off even when they're safe - Silicon Canals
Excessive apologizing often stems from childhood experiences of mistreatment and can lead to chronic self-blame in adulthood.
#psychological-trauma
Psychology
fromPsychology Today
1 month agoWhen Everything Becomes "Trauma"
Psychological trauma, originating from the Greek word for 'wound,' evolved from describing physical injuries to mental wounds in the late 19th century, with usage tripling since the 1970s as the term expanded to encompass various difficult life experiences.
Psychology
fromSilicon Canals
1 month agoPsychology says children who had to parent themselves or their siblings don't just lose their childhood - they develop a permanent nervous system dysregulation that makes rest feel dangerous and relaxation feel like neglecting an invisible responsibility - Silicon Canals
Childhood responsibilities create nervous system patterns where vigilance, responsibility, and constant caretaking become equated with safety and love, while rest triggers guilt and anxiety in adulthood.
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