"My high-school best friend Macy, mother of two boys aged two and four, explained over coffee that she tries never to say 'No'. Midway through our two-hour catch-up, the older one threw a small fist when she stopped him from tipping the sugar bowl into his milk. 'I can see you're upset because you really wanted to pour the sugar yourself,' Macy said calmly. 'But sugar isn't for pouring right now. How about you stir your milk instead?'"
"My friend learns everything about parenting from books and Instagram reels, not her own mother. And gentle parenting certainly isn't the only parenting philosophy trending among young mothers these days. AI-powered apps like Glow Baby, which has garnered more than a million downloads, help mothers track milestones and manage feedings, while also providing personalised recommendations tailored to each baby's needs."
"Always validate the child's feelings, prioritise warmth at all costs, and avoid negative words such as 'no', 'don't' or 'bad' - that's how Macy explained gentle parenting to me. This certainly isn't how she and I remember our mothers parenting us in 1990s Hong Kong. Before Amy Chua's Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother (2011) scandalised Western readers, Chinese parents were already infamous for their strictness - corporal punishment for wayward and defiant children, academic excellence as non-negotiable,"
Gentle parenting prioritises emotional validation, constant warmth, and avoidance of negative words like 'no', 'don't' or 'bad'. Parents using gentle parenting reframe discipline into choices and empathetic explanations to preserve children's self-esteem. The approach contrasts with stricter 1990s Chinese parenting that relied on corporal punishment, uncompromising academic expectations, and single, sharp prohibitions. Many millennial parents learn parenting methods from books, social media and apps rather than from their own parents. Technology such as AI-powered apps track milestones, manage feedings, and deliver personalised recommendations. Parenting debates also involve sleep-training methods, with cry-it-out advocates and attachment proponents disagreeing over self-soothing and physiological stress effects.
Read at Aeon
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