"The year was 2014. I (Assael) was a young, exhausted father of two small kids and a couples therapist, married just three years. One night I was reading Mating in Captivity by psychotherapist Esther Perel when I came across a line that stopped me cold: "Most people are going to have two pr three marriages or committed relationships in their adult life. Some of us will h ave them with the same person." That sentence puzzled me, haunted me, and eventually inspired me."
"Galit and I were learning how to be partners and new parents at the same time. The idea that I'd have to "remarry" her someday felt strange, even threatening. Four years later, after several life changes and one deep marital crisis, I finally understood. Our first marriage had ended. We were still together, but the version of ourselves that said "I do" no longer existed. The question wasn't whether I'd get married again. It was whether I'd get married again to Galit."
Every relationship changes as partners evolve physically, emotionally, and in desire. Remarrying a partner means consciously recommitting to the new versions of each other rather than expecting the original marriage to persist unchanged. Many couples lack a clear blueprint or roadmap for how to remarry, which leaves relationships stuck in resentment and drift. Practical relational skills that support remarriage include playful connection, owning personal shadows, practicing full-body listening, and using direct, honest communication. An example shows long-term partners who remained together after a rupture but had to decide whether to recommit to each other's transformed selves.
Read at Psychology Today
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