When Big Ego Is Our Partner

"We or anyone might sometimes come across with an egotistical manner. This includes being arrogant, belligerent, entitled, and controlling-the compulsions of a person driven by ego. Here are some challenging practices that can help us let go of egotism and build a healthy ego, one with self-esteem, humility, and loving-kindness. The practices may seem over-the-top in what they ask of us, a radically spiritual way of living."

"1. Follow the Golden Rule: Act toward others as you would want them to act toward you. 2. Keep the needs of others in mind, especially in little ways-an antidote to selfishness. 3. Find ways to maintain healthy self-esteem without showing off. It's OK to be a big shot; just don't act that way. 4. Let go of ranking, especially of elitism, seeing yourself as above others. 5. Acknowledge not knowing something or show that you need support or help."

"6. Take feedback as useful information, not as criticism, even when it is meant that way. 7. Apologize when you know you have harmed or offended anyone. Make amends if necessary. 8. Let go of attempts to control, dominate, or manipulate others. 9. Give people leeway and make allowances for their errors rather than pointing out or picking up on every little thing they do that irks you. 10. Welcome disagreement because it can lead to dialogue. This puts the emphasis in discuss"

Letting go of egotism requires cultivating humility, loving-kindness, and healthy self-esteem while resisting arrogance, entitlement, and controlling impulses. Cooperative attitudes and seeking common ground replace competition and ongoing opposition. In intimate relationships, protecting the partnership instead of defending individual ego strengthens bonds. Practical habits include following the Golden Rule, attending to others' needs, admitting ignorance, accepting feedback, apologizing and making amends, and avoiding dominance or manipulation. Allowing leeway for others’ errors, welcoming disagreement as a path to dialogue, and leaning on grace or a higher power support transformation toward a more loving, humble, and emotionally mature self.

Read at Psychology Today