"By that point in my 50s, I struggled to maintain an erection naturally but it never diminished her enthusiasm in bed, or mine. For me, orgasming is just one small part of sex; with the right person, just being naked together is pure joy. Growing up with a single mother in the 1950s, I did not learn much about sex at home and I lost my virginity at university to the girl I ended up marrying."
"My sex life with my first wife was pretty active for a long time, but then gradually she became more withdrawn and sex became less and less frequent, and eventually ceased. As a friend told me: Alex, you kept a lesbian happy in bed for a quarter of a century!' By the point she came out as a lesbian, I'd sort of guessed that it was going to happen. Getting divorced was difficult but it didn't hurt my confidence."
"Sex with Beth felt radically different right from the start more of a shared adventure. In the beginning we'd do it every day. Now, it's maybe a couple of times a month, but it's still incredible. We're always letting our hands wander under restaurant tables, or on the escalator on the underground. Hardly anybody clocks it because nobody expects seventysomethings to be cheekily feeling each other up in public."
Beth and I met online twenty years ago and had sex within days of meeting in person. She displayed strong sexual enthusiasm and open-mindedness, which contrasted with struggles to maintain erections in my fifties. Orgasming is a small part of sex; being naked together brings joy. Growing up with a single mother in the 1950s limited sexual education. The first marriage began sexually active, then became sexless as my wife withdrew and later came out as a lesbian, leading to divorce. Sex with Beth became a shared adventure, now occurring monthly, with public playfulness and age-related adjustments like less penetrative sex, medical erectile aids, and specialized lubricants.
Read at www.theguardian.com
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