"This subtype is organized around the maintenance of personal comfort at other people's expense, which means the harm often arrives as what wasn't done-what wasn't tended, repaired, or shouldered-rather than as a spectacular display of grandiose arrogance. In reality, this flavor looks like an unfussy, "Don't make a big deal," peace-at-all-costs stance that masks an entitlement not to be bothered,"
"What is evident is the unspoken rule that everyone else should adjust, absorb, cover, and keep the train running so the neglectful person's day, resources, or peace remain undisturbed. When pressed to "show up," they may grow contemptuous or erupt briefly, then slide back into that cool, unbothered calm that reads like maturity while functioning as a petulant refusal. The pattern corrodes partners"
Neglectful narcissism centers on preserving personal comfort by omitting duties, minimizing partners' bids, and avoiding emotional labor. Harm occurs through omission: unattended problems, stalled repairs, and unassumed responsibilities. Entitlement to comfort presents as calmness while shifting invisible labor, time, and costs onto others. Such individuals often rationalize evasion by claiming busyness or depletion and resist conflict because conflict demands effort they refuse to expend. The pattern breeds resentment, corrodes relationships, and burdens partners with sustained repair work. Research links entitlement with increased conflict and low agreeableness, underscoring that omission is not harmless neglect.
Read at Psychology Today
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