"Restaurant patrons should not be asking such questions, but Miss Manners understands that they do and that appearing to be offended or unfriendly can have adverse consequences for both the business and your employment. The polite response is to say, in a bright, friendly way, No, I'm from here before moving on to restaurant business. This will not lessen your own annoyance at being asked, but if it ever-so-slightly embarrasses the patron, perhaps you will have saved the next employee from such unwanted attention."
"The get-together is no longer a team party. Is it proper etiquette for someone who volunteered to host a party for a select group to invite her own additional guests? GENTLE READER: No, but before she ruins the party, Miss Manners would like to check that we all know the score. The team party was never going to be strictly members of the team, any more than non-players were barred from attendance at games."
When customers ask employees whether they are related to a co-worker or come from a particular country because of an accent, the recommended response is a bright, friendly "No, I'm from here," followed by redirecting to restaurant business. Employees should avoid appearing offended to protect both the business and their employment. A person who volunteers to host a party for a select group should not unilaterally invite unrelated guests. Team-related gatherings can involve nonplayers at games or practices, so expectations about who may attend should be clarified before judging a host's choices.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
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