"I had a learning disorder, and my sister would constantly correct people and say she wasn't the "stupid" one-I was. My sister started the college track in ninth grade while I went to a middling school. Our parents did their best to treat us equally and celebrate our accomplishments, but you really can't compare taking a beauty school test to getting a master's at 21."
"My husband and I were debating whether to have a third child when my sister bulldozed in. She was ready to be a mom, had everything planned out, saved, and sorted, except her eggs weren't viable. So the completely obvious solution was to give her our embryos! We refused, and my sister threw a fit. I was apparently stealing her only chance to be a mother, and worse, my parents are on her side."
The twins grew up in competitive, antagonistic roles, with one pursuing advanced academics and the other managing a learning disorder and a different path. Parents attempted equal treatment, but accomplishments diverged and insults persisted. The writer married, had two children via IVF, and retained frozen embryos. When the sister's eggs proved nonviable, she demanded those embryos as her only chance for motherhood and reacted angrily when refused. Parents sided with the sister and minimized the cost to the couple. The writer fears that denying the demand may permanently poison their relationship.
Read at Slate Magazine
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