"I have been dating Rita for four months. We peck on the lips, hug and hold hands, but we have had only one real kiss so far. Rita was first married for 22 years to an emotionally abusive man and then remarried to a manipulative one. She said we were going too fast and she wanted to slow down. I understood and have exerted no pressure on her."
"Continue allowing your relationship with Rita to develop slowly. The woman has had two unsuccessful marriages, so it's no wonder she's slow to commit. If, after a year (eight months from now), Rita still feels uncomfortable calling you boyfriend or companion, revisit the conversation and decide then if you have invested enough time."
"After reading so many horrible letters sent to you from people about their mothers-in-law, I feel compelled to write to you about mine. I met her 43 years ago when I was dating her oldest son (now my husband). From the moment we met, she treated me with caring, acceptance and love. She and my father-in-law raised five amazing children, and they treated their children's spouses as if we were their own. She devoted her entire life to caring for and nurturing her husband, children, grandchildren and great-g"
A man has dated Rita four months with pecks, hugs, hand-holding, and one full kiss. Rita endured a 22-year marriage to an emotionally abusive man and a second marriage to a manipulative partner; she asked to slow the relationship. She cancels dates and intermittently goes silent, while both parties are not seeing anyone else and the writer has serious intentions. Allow the relationship to develop slowly and, if after a year Rita still resists calling the writer boyfriend or companion, revisit and decide whether enough time has been invested. A separate correspondent describes a mother-in-law of 43 years who treated her with care, acceptance, and love and devoted her life to nurturing family.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
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