Her husband developed significant weight gain after a serious illness and surgery and now wears T-shirts and pants that are too small, exposing his midsection in public. Gentle reminders and medical advice to lose weight have not produced change. The healthiest response is to accept his current state while remaining compassionate. Adjustment to bodily change after illness can be slow and traumatic. Buying new clothes may feel like acknowledging a different body and can take time. Redirecting embarrassment into empathy and accompanying him with patience can make social situations more comfortable.
Sometimes with loved ones and friends, the healthiest but hardest thing to do is to say, this is where he is right now and to accept that. You don't have to love it; you don't have to like it; some aspects of it can still pose a question in your mind. But, by saying, this is where he is right now, you acknowledge that he's on a journey and it may not be going as fast as you want, but you're along for the ride.
It would be surprising if your husband wasn't having a little trouble adjusting to his new physique, particularly since it developed after a serious illness, which can be traumatic. There have been a lot of life changes in the last six years, internally and externally. Buying new clothes may feel like an acknowledgment that his life is different or his body is responding in a different way than it has previously. That takes time.
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