Asking Eric: I draw the line at this woman smoking in my yard

"Dear Eric: My youngest son is in his mid-40s. He had some heavy mental issues a few years ago and moved back home to our basement. Prior to the breakdown, his wife left him, he lost a job he loved, and soon he started dating Leslie. She became pregnant, and our beautiful granddaughter was born but passed at two months and two days from SIDS. Our hearts were and are still broken."

"When he moved in, Leslie was not part of the deal, but she is now and I'm not sure what to do. She loves our son and he seems to love her, but she is very arrogant and argumentative toward me and my husband. I do blame her for my grandchild suffering from withdrawals, but not for her death. I have never spoken those words to her, and I do try to be pleasant when she is present."

"We are non-smokers and so is my son, but Leslie smokes and that has been a great point of contention. I have no qualms speaking my mind when it comes to not smoking in my house or even in my yard, I do not want to smell or see cigarette butts all over the place. She said I was being unreasonable to expect her to leave the yard to smoke."

My youngest son, in his mid-40s, returned to his parents' basement after severe mental-health problems following his wife leaving and job loss. He began dating Leslie, who became pregnant; their daughter was born and experienced Adderall withdrawal in the NICU, then died at two months from SIDS. Leslie later moved in despite not being part of the original agreement. Leslie smokes and behaves arrogantly and argumentatively toward the parents. The parents prohibit smoking in the house and yard and insist she leave the property to smoke. The parents believe they are justified in setting and enforcing house rules for residents and guests.

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