"1. Lower the temperature. While this can be as brief as the overnight cooling-off period, I've also met couples where getting a break to cool off can last weeks, even months. Resentments have been building; conversations or even questions can quickly turn into an argument. You need space and time to get the angry chatter in your head to simply settle."
"2. Give you space to think and sort. You no longer know what you want, how you feel, or what to do. You need not only to be away from the tension, but also to take a break from some of the everyday responsibilities of parenting or managing a household. Separation offers a respite that will hopefully help you realize what you need, sort through options, and come up with a next-steps game plan."
Separation can serve multiple purposes: to lower the temperature after heated conflict, to provide space for reflection, to test whether partners will miss each other, and to experience being alone. Short separations can be overnight while others may last weeks or months. Separation can relieve daily responsibilities to allow sorting of feelings and planning next steps. Mapping clear rules of engagement and expectations is important. Emotional responses and perspectives are likely to change over time, so partners should revisit agreements as clarity and needs evolve.
Read at Psychology Today
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