Celebrate Life or Mourn a Death?

"The problem is that if there is only a focus on celebrating this life-or an entry into a next life-we deny and disenfranchise the legitimate grief that mourners experience. Someone loved has died. Whatever comfort is offered by the nature of the life and legacies of the deceased-or the beliefs of an afterlife, however defined-does not change that in funerals mourners gather to say goodbye to someone they loved."

"Funerals do offer opportunities to share memories and recount events from the life of the deceased. In some cultures, funerals have been viewed as a homecoming - spiritual events where mourners see the funeral as a rite of passage to the afterlife. That too is legitimate, as funerals offer an occasion to address the ways that mourners' spiritual beliefs offer comfort-reminding mourners of the ways their spirituality speaks to their loss."

An increasing funeral industry trend reframes funerals as a 'celebration of life,' emphasizing contributions and legacies rather than sadness. Funerals also provide opportunities to share memories and, in some cultures, function as spiritual homecomings and rites of passage that draw on mourners' spiritual beliefs for comfort. Equal attention must be given to acknowledging and mourning the death to avoid denying or disenfranchising legitimate grief. Funerals remain occasions for loved ones to say goodbye. The Dual-Process Model of Grief suggests grieving individuals need to oscillate between two distinct mourning processes.

Read at Psychology Today