There is a critical distinction between feeling successful and being successful. Feeling successful provides immediate emotional satisfaction without actual results, leading to a cycle of comfort addiction. Routine systems, like morning rituals and networking, offer a sense of productivity devoid of meaningful achievement. Actual success, on the other hand, is often uncomfortable and involves taking actions that may initially feel unsuccessful, such as reaching out to prospects or creating rough drafts. The brain can struggle to differentiate between these two experiences, reinforcing the allure of feeling successful without genuine accomplishment.
We have built elaborate systems to feel productive without being productive, from morning routines to networking events, designed to give us the emotional payoff of progress.
Feeling successful is immediate and controllable, achieved through buying planners or attending conferences, delivering dopamine hits of potential energy.
Being successful is delayed and uncomfortable; it involves doing tasks that feel unsuccessful, like cold calling or writing drafts that are not good.
Feeling successful can be addictive because it is easier than being successful, triggering the same reward pathways in the brain.
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