"I intentionally tell my kids all the things that I wanted to hear: I'm proud of you, I love you, etc. I hug them frequently. We talk about their feelings a lot. Although I still struggle to talk about my own emotions with them, I do try to open up. I do worry that I was pretty emotionally shut down in the early years of their life, and probably did cause them some emotional neglect in that regard."
"She said when you have a daughter, they 'suck all your beauty away,' etc. I have two daughters, whom I've poured so much love into that they now spread it everywhere themselves. Recently, my eldest said a girl in her class said another girl's hair is ugly. My daughter said to her that everyone's hair is beautiful. I was so proud because it means it's working."
"Using my child as an emotional support animal. I do love my dad, but I didn't need to be responsible for a grown man's feelings."
Parents identify specific harmful patterns from their upbringing and deliberately adopt different behaviors to protect their children. Strategies include not letting personal moods dictate household tone, avoiding using children as emotional supports for adults, and countering negative body-image messaging. Parents emphasize frequent verbal affirmation, physical affection, and open conversations about feelings to foster emotional security. Some acknowledge past emotional shutdown and regret, while actively working to repair and provide better emotional modeling. Early evidence of success appears in children's compassionate responses toward others, suggesting intentional changes can interrupt intergenerational cycles of harm.
Read at BuzzFeed
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