"When it came time for the wedding cake to be served, it was discovered that someone had carved out more than a few forkfuls. Amanda's cousin "Ryan" (same age) is known to be a troublemaker and had been playing in the vicinity of where the cake was. The blame fell on him (he denied being responsible), and he ended up getting punished."
"I can tell that you're tempted to leave the family "troublemaker" on the hook for this one, but I think that would be wrong-and it would send a terrible message to Amanda. Once you've told your family the truth, Amanda should also take responsibility and also apologize to her cousin. She needs to know that it's unacceptable to allow other people to be punished for her actions."
A parent should inform affected family members when a child falsely allows another to be blamed. The child should take responsibility, apologize to the person wrongly punished, and face appropriate consequences to reinforce accountability. Allowing someone else to suffer for another's misdeed teaches avoidance of responsibility and perpetuates injustice. Family members may harbor resentment over perceived spoiling of important events, so correcting the record can prevent lingering grudges. Restoring honesty and requiring a direct apology helps repair relationships and provides a clearer lesson about fairness and integrity for the child.
Read at Slate Magazine
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