"We were meeting potential landlords, an older couple renting out their home for the winter. It's a beautiful house, and from the view off the porch, I can already tell it's perfect. I want us to appear perfect, too - the kind of family that'll fit right in. So when they leaned down to say hello to my 7-year-old son, Oscar, and he ignored them, I braced myself."
"In these moments, I feel a reflexive pressure to smooth over Oscar's lack of politeness, to apologize on his behalf, and reassure everyone that we are, in fact, the kind of family who belongs here (wherever "here" happens to be). Then I remind myself that my children's behavior is no reflection on their character - or mine. My kids are great"
A family visits potential landlords where a neurodivergent 7-year-old son avoids greeting and eye contact while a 5-year-old daughter charms strangers. The parent feels pressure to apologize for perceived rudeness but chooses not to equate surface politeness with character. The son is described as curious, funny, and creative, yet unlikely to engage in small talk or perform smiles for adults. The parent redirects interactions to the daughter and reminds themself that the children's behavior does not reflect parental worth. The parent expresses indifference to whether the children use conventional manners or swear. Oscar isn't officially diagnosed as autistic.
Read at Business Insider
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