"I love reading romance novels whole-heartedly. Knowing the general beats of what is going to happen, and that there will definitely be a happily ever after, is comforting to me. I love reading about yearning and love and sex, too. The books I read are not "closed-door romances"-they're pretty smutty with racy sex scenes. The particular book she was reading does start out very "casual" and before it turns more serious, though all with consenting adults."
"I was probably around your daughter's age when I started borrowing my grandma's bodice-rippers. My mom definitely noticed, let me know she'd noticed and laughed at me, but then she shrugged and never mentioned it again. Pretending you never saw the book is one way to go, and might spare your daughter some embarrassment. (If she wanted you to know she was reading your book, after all, it wouldn't be under her pillow!)"
A parent discovered a favorite explicit romance novel under a 13-year-old daughter's pillow and felt unsure how to respond. The parent enjoys racy romance for its yearning, love, and guaranteed happily-ever-after and notes the books include explicit sex among consenting adults. The parent remembers reading similar books at a young age without harm. One option is to pretend not to have seen the book to avoid embarrassing the child. A more proactive approach is a gentle, nonshaming conversation that normalizes curiosity, clarifies that many romances depict intimacy unrealistically, and affirms boundaries and consent.
Read at Slate Magazine
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