Child psychologist Reem Raouda identified five harmful phrases parents commonly use that can trigger a fight-or-flight response in children. She argues that threats or commands, such as 'Because I said so' or 'If you don’t listen, you’ll lose [X privilege],' hinder effective communication and promote defiant behavior. Instead, Raouda advocates for phrases that emphasize understanding and respect, like explaining decisions and offering agency to children. This approach fosters better behavior and a more respectful parent-child relationship, steering clear of punitive language that can be counterproductive.
"Because I said so" shuts down communication and teaches blind obedience. Explaining your reasoning helps the child feel respected, acknowledging their feelings while reinforcing authority in a calm way.
Threats can create defiance and force kids into a defensive state. Shifting the power dynamic allows for agency while maintaining firm boundaries, enhancing respectful leadership.
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