The firearms officer expressed deep regret over the incident, stating he completely believed the situation was life-threatening, often feeling that he and his colleagues were just seconds away from death. He articulated an intense awareness of the pressure and fear associated with the response to the bombing threats in London, demonstrating insight into the psychological toll of such scenarios. Yet, despite his own suffering, he acknowledged the family of Jean Charles de Menezes as the true victims of his actions.
Reflecting on his decision to shoot, the officer mentioned, 'I know that sounds really, really selfish, but that's how I feel.' He outlined a complex emotional landscape where he tries to compartmentalize his experience, revealing his reluctance to confront the memories and potential distress related to that day. His acceptance that he could forget facial details of de Menezes hints at the broader impact of trauma and the coping mechanisms deployed by those in high-stress roles.
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