"I love hockey, but following it so closely for so long has warped me as a person. I have seen too much. Now there is no joy left inside me, only irritability and scorn. Too many people have said annoying things about hockey for too long. Today it ends. I present to you: all the annoying ways people talk about hockey and why it has to stop, or I swear to god I'm going to crash out."
"Magic number / Tragic number I don't know what this is. I have been watching this sport for 30 years and covering it for 15, and I still don't understand what a magic number is. I can look it up, and I can even give a vague definition to a normie like my mom, but the core concept escapes me."
A long-term hockey follower describes emotional burnout from constant exposure to the sport and persistent, irritating clichés. Common phrases like “clinch a berth,” “magic number,” “games in hand,” and calls for “consistency” are singled out as confusing or nonsensical. The speaker confesses decades of watching and covering hockey but still fails to understand certain jargon and statistical concepts. Repetition and sloppy language from fans, analysts, and teams amplify frustration and erode pleasure. Personal anecdotes and blunt observations emphasize that rhetorical tics in hockey commentary contribute to lasting scorn and a diminished capacity for joy.
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