"I'd want to know if anybody nominated for a high-level job in Washington legitimately assaulted somebody ... If people have an allegation to make, come forward and make it ... We'll decide whether or not it's credible." - Senator Lindsey Graham, December 2024
Your hearing will take place in person at [specify venue] and will be streamed across our digital platforms. If the "story" you tell proves to be especially [timely / compelling / salacious] ... footage of your testimony might be aired live on cable-news channels ...
First, it has allowed us to (re)introduce the phrase "legitimately assaulted" into the public lexicon. Second, to be very honest with you, Accuser, we as a group have been slightly concerned about our standing with some women of late.
Third, if you [ignore / decline / are honestly a bit baffled by] our invitation, we may publicize your refusal to cooperate with us and express our dismay at your defiance.
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